Will you blow on my dice?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
