i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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