sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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