What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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