doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Ladies don't puke and tell
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
