we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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