plz talk dirty to me
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
