She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
