It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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