Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize
