He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
be right there i have to get my cape
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
