I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
