would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
