I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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