you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
