Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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