Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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