chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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