Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
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