I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
