lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
