Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
