she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
