GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
