we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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