I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
