Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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