I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
