I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize