ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
