just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
