i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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