But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Just invented taco cereal.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
