ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
