Having a random hookup so left but love u
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
