I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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