school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
