sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
