I'm really into asian looking animals
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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