call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
