im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize