She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
