you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
