I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Randomize
