I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Randomize