Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize