Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
