You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
