This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
