i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
