Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize